Getting Back Up

Tuesday September 9th

I got the job!!!

It has been exhausting several months, begging borrowing getting back on my feet. Proving to my family that I can be trusted. 

I know they are still a bit skeptical, rehab was a nightmare, shit there were plenty of times I wanted to give up, how I could expect my family to believe in me when I could not believe in myself. 

So after several interviews and trying to convince total strangers I can be trusted I was finally hired by a solid firm.

Sure they pride themselves on giving people second chances, after all the chance I had in life I did not hold my breath for this one. 

It's funny several of the interviews I went on prior I had great feelings for, only to be disappointment after no return calls, but this one was tough, I thought for sure they would not get back to me, but they want me to start this coming Monday, as long as i pass their drug tests (for once in my adult life I am not concerned at all, i will be peeing in a cup with a grin).  

Wednesday September 10th

Had lunch with my father and sister this afternoon. My mom didn't show, I wasn't surprised. 

I scraped together what I can find so I can pay. I know I will be struggling even with a paycheck, but I wanted to show I can take care of myself.  

Anyway the lunch was to give them the news about the job, Lizzy was so happy for me. My little sister, she always saw the best in me, even when I thought I was lost, her sweet innocent face always looked up to me like I can do no wrong. 

She is still so young, but growing up so fast, being eleven years older i remember so clearly the day they brought her home, I was so excited to have a little sister. Seeing her respect for me in her eyes alone makes my decisions the past year and a half so so worth. Anything less from now on would kill. 

She will be seventeen in December. I am planning to live off of Rama noodles till then so she can have a sweet birthday, not enough will make up for the ones missed or the shit I put her through over the years. But it won't stop me from trying. 

And papa, seeing the pride in his eyes this afternoon nearly brought me to tears. No I'm not going to lie, I wept like a baby when he hugged me and gave me a kiss on each cheek.   

They held onto my every word, little Lizzy made me tell the story of the interview twice. 

We briefly talked about mama, pops tried to excuse her, I knew the truth, I understood. I will keep trying, one day I will go back home on my knees and beg for her forgiveness.   But I need to forgive myself first. 

After pop insisted on paying, he can be so stubborn sometimes, but in the end he saw in me that I needed to do this, a small token but letting me take the check was a very tiny thing but it meant respect. 

I returned to the halfway house with a skip in my step, i even were the shirt and tie i were to the interview (only ones I got). 

Thursday September 11th

So I had that dream again, THE dream. 

It's after 3AM, I don't know if I can't go back to sleep or just don't want to. So I am writing to distract myself from my nightmare. 

In a few short hours i have to stop by my new job to take the drug test. I don't want to show up sleepy, but I am afraid to drink coffee in the morning as to not skew the results or take sleep aide for the same reason. 

I am going to try my sleep again. 

------

So peed in a cup. Yeah not the best opener for my journal but I am happy that this is the first that i am worried that something I did a week, a few days, or even a night ago would haunt me. 

Still a bit tired, after i check in with my PO i think i am going to take a nap. Might as well take advantage of my free time I am planning to work a shitload of hours! 

After pissing in the cup I ran into ms moira, the lady who interviewed me, she seems a hell of a lot nicer now then during the interview, i basically volunteered myself on three different projects. I know I may have but off more than I can chew, but if i throw myself into it it's sink or swim, right?

I thought at first it was a small law firm, but the office i interviewed in was just an annexed office from a larger firm. My first job is to help catalogue and pack records to move to the larger building. 

Ms Moira is going to point me in the right direction to get my bachelors. Getting my associates was very difficult, I can use all the help I can get. 

I am looking forward to starting work on Monday, if it was not for my own lawyer doing pro bono work, working his ass off for me cause he saw my potential, i think this is what i want so I can give back. 

I guess i got a lot of people to thank and to apologize to. If it were not for that night though i don't think I would be here writing this.

------

Meeting with Burke, my PO, went okay as usual, through me off by a surprise drug test, so twice today I got to pee in cups. 

He barely gave me an 'uh huh' when i told him i got a job, without even making eye contact he pushed a form in front of me to fill out. 

You know I was piss at first but then I realized I have nothin to prove to him, fuck I ain't got nothin to prove to anyone but myself, so with pride i filled out his form giving the details of my new employment. I already disclosed to the firm my records, I'm gonna do this right, won't hide nothin won't lie about Shit so no shit will come back to bite me in the ass later. 

Afterwards I thought about officer Burke, he probably sees so many low lives pass through his office, most makin promises none succeeding, I thought I had it bad but this poor Schmuck had to witness the low point of humanity. 

Looks like those critical thinking and humanities classes paid off. Note to self, after my probation is over a year from now I will pay Burke a visit and show him at least one person can change. 

Friday September 12th

Fuck!!! Fuck fuck fuck fuck!!!

The firm called me this morning, they said they had a mix up with some paper work and the position was no longer available. 

Jesus, what is this worth it?  Why am i fucking trying? Why didn't you just kill me two years ago? 

I should have died, if this is my karma working against me because of all the shit did and what i did that night, i might as well be dead I might as well go to hell then live through this hell on earth. 

Fuck this shit, thought writing would help , thought by putting it on paper would...

just fuck

Saturday September 13th

I almost used today. 

I risked going down to the old neighborhood to score. I ignored the old haunts, the gangs, and that alley way. 

I had the rock in my hand, my last twenty was already exchanged hands and the rock was handed off to me by the currier.  

I started east to the only place I can take this hit unseen, an abandoned building that was marked 'condemned' years ago, now riddled with junkies so far gone that this was their only place of refuge to get high. 

I wanted to go there so I can get lost in the sea of faceless zombies and just melt away. Too cowardly to just straight up take my own life, but to end it in a blissful high. 

Unsurprisingly the building was still there, cops occasionally raid the place, most of the time the junkies get advance warning, but in the end the police leave them to their devices, as long as we are killing ourselves and not others (I guess)

The back entrance loose board access is still present, getting in was easy. 

I only had one thing on my mind was to shoot up and get lost in my own head. 

Without even realizing it I automatically made my way to the corner my old gang used to occupy. 

No old memories surfaced. 

A  bedroom in once was a two bedroom apartment, the other bedroom long ago got lost into the neighboring apartment with walls being torn away by time, neglect, and vandals. 

Immediately i noticed I was not alone, on the far corner was a dark shape lost in his or hers own wonderland.

I just made myself 'comfortable' in the opposite corner knowing my roommate was in no condition to mind. 

I slid my back down the wall and sat on the floor bringing my knees to my chest. Soon my eyes adjusted to the darkness as I unwrapped my prize. 

While opening the baggy, a loud snort caught my attention, I quickly looked toward the figure in the corner. From what I can make out he was facing me, his eye appeared to be open and staring at me or in my direction. 

He looked awfully familiar. 

Trying to ignore the man who had no care for me at all, I went back to the task at hand, but I could not shake the mystery of this stranger. 

Finally giving into my curiosity I leaned forward going to my hands and knees (still gripping the drugs in my right fist) I slowly crawled across the room so I can get a better look.  

My God!!!! It was Carlos, shit fucking Carlos!!!

He was in bad shape, real bad shape. 

Looking at my old friend immediately brought those suppressed memories of that fateful night to the surface. 

Me leaning over that poor girl, Carlos standing behind me, laughing, laughing at the disgusting thing I was about to do to that innocent angel. My god I am a monster!

I was monster. 

Remember looking over my shoulder after Carlos grew unusually silent, to see that dark figure in my peripheral, the one that haunts my nightmares till this day,  then flying through the air. 

I could have died that night, fuck I should have died. It would have been the least I deserved. 

Finally waking up on the roof of an apartment building ten blocks away. I would have past it off for a drug induced dream if it were not for that hand shaped bruise on my shoulder that took weeks to heal. 

Snapping out of my daydream, still on my hands and knees I lifted my right fist, forced it open and looked at the contents in disgust then chucked it against the wall. 

I don't remember making my way out of that building, nor the first few blocks, but i ran and ran and ran, i found myself in front of my childhood apartment, where my folks and little sister still resided. 

Without a second thought i made my way to the fourth floor and banged on the door.  My momma answered and when she saw me she opened her mouth to yell, but before she got a word out I dropped to my knees hugged her at the waist and wept.

I wept uncontrollably, soundlessly my mother pried my arms from her body enough to join me at kneeling level and held me tightly and began to weep herself, my face buried in her shoulder, my tears soaking her blouse as hers ran down my neck in a river.

When we finally broke free; it was then I noticed my papa and Lizzy had joined in.

It must have been some sight for the neighbors who peeked through their peepholes to see a family on their knees crying at the thresh-hold.

After dinner and hours of talking they let me stay on the couch this evening, I am very tired, it had been a long ass day, but I had to get this day on paper before a lot of it faded from memory.

Sunday September 14^th

I dreamed again, of that night of that alley, but this time it was different.

This time at the end of the alley the girl was not there, at first it was empty.  It started the same way where I ran down the dark passage unable to control my actions, reliving the evil of that night, but this time when I made it to the dead end the girl was not there.

For the first time I was able to take control.  I quickly turned around, Carlos was not there, but the dark figure was.

At first I was scared but not for long.  Instead of grabbing me he just pointed to the end of the alley.  I turned around to look at what he was pointing at and saw a being of a pure light, then I woke.

I am not sure if that figure was an angel or not, but what I was sure of that was the last night I was going to have that nightmare.  I have not come close to forgiving myself yet, but I know I am on the correct path to learn how.

My family is getting up now, I agreed to go with them to church.

------

I forgot to turn the ringer off during mass, my phone chimed in the middle of sermon, my mother almost blew an aneurism.  Forgetting how to work the damn thing I plucked out the battery.

After service I quickly excused myself and checked my messages, only my PO and my resumes have my phone number.

The only message was from the firm! They quickly explained they called the wrong person on Friday!!! I was the reason the position was no longer available because it went to me, I was not supposed to get that call and they need me to report to the office at 6AM!!!!!

In the hall of the church once again I was on my knees (the third time this weekend) when my little sister found me, I was laughing hysterically, she thought I lost it.  After I told her about the call, she fell to the floor next to me and joined in on the laughter.

I got the job!!!

 ©2013 Kinse, My Sweet Hero

And Four to Go

“Good morning my dream man, you are quite the sleeper.” My smiling bride stood over me as I open my heavy lids allowing the morning sun to flood over  me.

I cleared the remaining cobwebs from my head by rubbing my eyes with the thumb and index finger of my right hand.  Turning to my wife about to mirror her grin, two large thuds leapt onto the bed either side of my resting form.

“Daddy, daddy!” my twin girls yelled as their 6 year old bodies kneed various parts of mine as they made their way up the bed for hugs and kisses. My other daughter, eleven years old, stood at the door beaming at the scene. 

Working night shifts throughout the week I return from the job after they leave for school and return from work after their bed times, so Saturdays are special when I eventually wake up midafternoon, this is the days I spend with my favorite four women.

Getting out of bed and lead to the kitchen by the twins holding each of my hands, wife follows with her arms crossed and my eldest daughter leads the way to the breakfast feast spread out on the counter.  Suddenly realizing I am starving I attempt to lunge for the pile of bacon, only to meet resistance by the little monkeys pulling me away from my prize and my other daughter tugging me by my tshirt toward the kitchen table.

Stickler for tradition we make it a point to gather around the table as a family as much as we can for meals.  I cherish these moments, this is why we were put here for this short period of time granted to us.  Family.

As I sit at the head, the three ladies fiddle over the buffet eager to serve the man they rarely see during the week.  Pride swells up as I admire the scene before me.  But something does not feel right, a distant memory, more like an instinct tugs at me.  I feel like I am forgetting something important, like suddenly remembering that you left the stove on or the front door unlocked as you just arrive at work.  I can just remember that….

A large glass of OJ being clonked and splashed onto the table startles me out of my daydream.  Sheri, the smallest of the twins, barely manages to get the glass from the counter to my place setting, not without leaving a trail of yellow drops in her wake.

Mary, my eleven year old, sets my silverware in front of me patting me on the head like a pup as she completes the setting with a folded cloth napkin.  I smile and look at each one of them as they complete the rest of the table.  I patiently wait for them to finish before digging into the mound of food before me.

The kids sit at their respective spots and dig in, showing no such restraint, my wife bends over to my seated level and moves her mouth to my ear.

I take a forkful of scrambled eggs and as I am about to shovel it in she whispers, “nana has volunteered to take the girls out for ice-cream tonight, so we will have the house to ourselves.”

The last six words were drawn out suggestively and grin deepening I shoved the forkful into my face.  Immediately I choked out the contents, the eggs had the texture of sand.

Still feeling the grains of dirt coating the inside of my mouth I reach for the juice to wash away the taste.  Concerned my wife places her hands to my face, instead of feeling the softness of her flesh I felt hard gravel.  Horrified I pulled away.

Equally terrified she screamed looking from my face to my blood on her hands.  Her screams, though, did not sound feminine at all; instead they sounded like…

..Caw…Caw…

I quickly closed my eyes to shield them from the burning daylight.  Second attempt I opened them more slowly allowing to adjust to the harshness.  As my eyes came into focus I saw two dark shapes a few feet away. 

I was laying on a hard rocky surface on my stomach, it was extremely hot, and there was a sharp pain in my right cheek.  Now that my vision was clearing I can clearly see that the two dark shapes were large crows, eagerly waiting to see if I was easy prey.

Forcing myself to sit up the crows decided I was not worth it and took off with one more cry of frustration.  Brushing myself off and taking in my surroundings I seemed to be in good shape with the exception of a small cut from the stone I was using as a pillow.

The dream of breakfast with my family fading as I racked my brain of how I got here, realizing I was still in my work uniform.  Ruling out mugging after I found my wallet, I hear a soft groan to my right.

Leaning over I searched the ground to find Tony not too far away, lying on his back he had his hand to his head as if he were waking up from one mother of a hangover.

Feeling like this might as well have been the morning after a hell of a party, our company had strict rules about drinking.  Any violations is met with an immediate dismissal and a lawsuit.  Vetting out people who were even careless about drinking even on off days, the firm took this shit seriously.

Seeing that Tony was okay for now I surveyed the area for the possibility of my other colleagues out here in the same predicament.  Sure enough I spotted Michael and Bruce, Bruce was already on his feet and was helping Michael to his.

Following his example I ignored the aches in my muscles and forced myself up making my way to Tony who seems to have his wit about him and is looking around himself.

“How the fuck….” He says looking up at me, but the words came out dry and raspy. 

He takes my proffered hand and when standing we make our way to the others. 

We are in a desert, the dry and rocking kind rather than sandy.  To the north of us about ten miles was a mountain range, to the south the barons seem to go on forever before we can see a lone mesa in the middle of the harsh landscape.

The sun was high above us so it was certainly after twelve PM.  We were now standing in a group taking in our surroundings.  Besides the cut on my face we seemed to be in good shape, nothing missing and nothing taken.  The only casualty was Bruce’s ‘GuardSafe’ patch over his left chest pocket, it must have torn while he was trying to roll over to stand up, the patch barely held on by a thread.

Michael, our night manager spoke first “Does anyone have any idea how we got out here?”

We shook our heads and I spoke up, “Last I remember sir, was walking the perimeter, one of us said something over the talkie but it gets foggy from there…next thing I am staring down a couple of crows.”

“That was me.” Tony chimed in, “I saw someone approaching the main gate, not close enough to make them, I called out on the talkie to see if it were one of yous.” He spoke in a thick Brooklyn accent.

We all look at each other shaking our heads, Michael was rubbing his chin taking in our words visibly trying to piece this thing together.  

Feeling around my pocket I found my iphone I quickly pulled it out and held it up.  The guys all looked on in interest, Bruce feeling around for his.

No dice, the phone was dead.

“I got something” Bruce said as his droid chimed signaling power up.

Moving in closer he instinctively held it to the sky while the power up screen was still loading.  When the screen finally turned to the main menu of the device we all slumped when the words No Service appear at the top left of the screen.

“Wait!” Bruce exclaims pointing to the date and time portion of the phone, “According to this it is only 3:12PM”

“What day?” Michael asks, stepping forward to get a closer look.

“Today?”  He responds quizzically as he stares at the date.

If that is correct, we have been out for less than twelve hours, I was on my 4AM perimeter check just before our night went to shit.

At this point we all came to the same conclusion Michael voicing it first.

“We must be somewhere near the west coast, if it is three our time and clearly after….”

He was cut off by a distant sound southwest of us.  We all turned our heads to see the source.  Off the horizon we spot a quick reflection of the sun, as the sound grew louder.  Soon we were able to make out a metallic shape.  It was an approaching truck.

Moving toward the vehicle the guys took off.

“Wait” I shouted.  They turned around slowing to a jog, I pointed directly to the west and finished “The truck is approaching from the south west, we need to head in that direction to try and cut it off.”

With that I took off, jogging at first and then a full blown run as I saw the truck was coming up quick.  But it was futile, we slowed as we watched it pass on by.  The road was still a good three miles due west of our position.

However not discouraged we continued with a renewed sense of purpose, for now we know there is a road and with that a way out of this predicament.

Epilogue

An elderly couple heading east on I10 spotted four uniformed men standing at the side of the road.  Slowing down to pick them up his wife did not protest.  Hitting the road from California, they were spending the first few months of retirement travelling across the United States. 

He came to a full stop and the lead man stopped at the open side door after slowing from a jog. 

“Trouble?” the old man asks.

“We seemed to be lost.” The lead man replies as he steps into the cab followed by two more.  The fourth man was just finishing up a phone call and hopped in closing the side door behind him.

After a quick round of introductions, the elderly couple assured that they made the correct decision agreed to drop them off to Phoenix.

The men sat in the back talking quietly to themselves as the one called Michael takes the offered phone from Bruce and places a call.  The conversation could not be made out but the men were all grimed face at some news after Michael hung up.

“You boys alright back there?” the old man shouts out his concern.

“Now worries Mr. Kline, we are just a bit wary from the walk.” Michael replies.

“Did you boys hear about that terrorist attack last night?” the old lady speaks up, “We almost didn’t make the trip when we heard the news this morning.”

The old man interrupts “I aint gonna let no a-rab ruin my plans, no offense son” he quickly adds the last part looking at Bruce who had a darker complexion.

“Um…non taken?” Bruce replies after he realized the old man meant him, asking in a quizzical tone since he was clearly Mexican, not Middle Eastern nor even African American.

After a moment of silence the old man spotted police lights coming up fast behind him.  Slowing down and moving somewhat onto the shoulder, the cop car just continues to tailgate him, matching his pace.  Taking the hint he continues to pull over to the side of the road coming to a complete stop, he takes a quick look in his mirror at his passengers only to seem them somewhat alarmed.

“Not sure why they are pullin me over, was barely doing five miles below the limit.” He peaks at them.

Two men approach from either side of the RV, quickly the old man realizes they are not police.

“Funny they seem to be military.”

 © 2013 Kinse, My Sweet Hero

Pursuit

Tak tak tak, of her heals hitting the concrete pavement as she turns down a one way street.  The sound of her pursuers now less than a short block away.

Stumbling over a stray garbage bag set out several hours earlier for the predawn pick up she cries out almost falling to her knees.  Quickly recovering she has no choice but to hold back anguish, she cannot afford to waste time.  Yelling out has already proven to be futile, only alerting more of his gang now riled by the hunt.

A beautiful prey celebrating her 21^st birthday separated from her herd of girlfriends by a fight with her boyfriend which seems so trivial now.

Why did I turn down the support of my friends,  she thought to herself.  Stubborn by nature even as a little girl she hid in her closet whenever things did not go her way, preferring to be alone rather than seek the comfort of those close.

Now wandering the streets of New York she came across three young men wearing red bandanas around their right thighs.  Being a young well-dressed NYU student she was quickly noticed, when they saw she was alone they slowly approached.  Quickly recovering from her emotional outburst she did not hesitate in darting the other way.  Calling out for help only attracted two more from a parked car doing gods knows what.

Now winded from the chase, her pursuers did not bother with a stealthy approach, hooting and hollering, knocking over pails and banging street signs they quickly closed the distance between them and their mark.

Her only option is to find a dark place to hide and hope they pass her by unnoticed.  Now a block ahead with a turn of the corner obstructing their view she sees a dark alley as a possible refuge.  Ignoring that screaming voice in her head telling her NOT to go use the alley, many scenes of many movies flip through her mind as the clueless victim goes into the basement or enters the attic or lets the hitchhiker into her car.

She moves down the narrow passage between the buildings, dodging stray pails and ducking behind a dumpster.  Making herself as small as possible she wills herself to calm down, listen to her surroundings.

The sound of footfalls grows louder.

She takes deep breaths; taking control of her heart rate.

The men’s hollering seem to be on top of her.

Her breathing now a controlled rhythm deep breaths, in then out in then out.

The steps slow down near the mouth of the alley.

In then out, her heart rate begins to pace her controlled breathing, her hearing now growing more acute.

The group slow past the alley, one looks in as they move on, sure that this beauty is not that stupid as to duck into such a trap; they continue one so they will not lose their prize in an obvious hollow pursuit.

Nearly holding her breath she listens intently to the clatter pass the opening, not daring to let the next one out in fear that she will give herself away.

The men move on hastening the hunt to make up for lost time.

Listening to them moving down the block she finally releases that aching breath, about to let the tears stream down her face, she holds her hands over her eyes and begins to….

Suddenly a loud clink clink clink of a glass bottle being kicked echoes off the brick walls of the surrounding apartment buildings.

Complete and utter terror grips her, unable to speak or breathe she falls heavily on her backside arms thrusted back to keep from lying flat on the hard ground.

Two of the five gang members walk around the metal dumpster eyeing the end of their pursuit almost seemingly eager for them to take her.  Like drooling hyenas they move toward her, not bothering to hide their excitement, malicious grins plastered on their faces the drool practically gleaming in what little light the moon had to offer in this hell called an alleyway.

She looks upon them defeated her heart no longer contained beating so fast it threatened to rip itself from her chest cavity.  Not being able to get up she attempts the only escape possible, a backwards crawl further down the alley, only to smack against the previously unseen dead end.

The closer of the two adjusted the uncomfortableness in his crotch, gently he goes to one knee as if to pop ‘the question’ leans forward, now on both knees, brushes a tear from the stream off her right cheek. 

His faux ‘concern’ only increases her terror, knowing what comes next every fiber of her being screams at her to fight, but the shear horror of the scene leaves her frozen in place, making her an easy prey as the first man leans closer as if to kiss, cupping her left breast with the hand that just before showed feigned compassion.

What happens next occurs in two heart beats, something she will remember the rest of her life, seared into her brain as the sun leaves its mark on ones eye after looking too long into the yellow ball.

Not wanting to make eye contact with her would be rapist, she could not help but look at his grinning companion as her eagerly waits for ‘sloppy seconds’.  For a split second she forgets what is about to happen and looks curiously at him.  Catching her eyes he his smile disappears.

The man suddenly vanishes into the night sky, her head darts up to follow the fucker as he quickly disappears from view.

The other man stops kissing her neck and leans back to look at her face to discern as to why the sudden change in her victims expression, the terror now gone from her eyes replaced by something else almost, almost, ruins the mood.

The girl, no longer enraptured with the person who is engulfing her body, clothing still intact, she spies a dark figure standing where the waiting gang member once stood.  Her breath is caught in her throat.

Before her attacker can turn around to see what she is looking at, the figure steps forward grabs the man by the shoulder and tosses him into the air, in pursuit of his fellow gang banger.

The girl takes one look at him, then covers her face in fear.  Not knowing what is to come next.

Instead of feeling the brunt of a possible third attacker, she feels the embrace of caring guardian as the dark stranger hugs her, she feels safe and begins to weep.

Still holding her hands tightly to her face she does not dare look at her protector, in fear that it was just a vision brought upon by trauma.

A distant memory plays at the corner of her mind as the figure lets her go.

“Kinse.” She whispers as she is completely released from his grasp.

All of a sudden another hand grabs her arm and tears her hand from her face, light rushes in and she lets out a long overdue scream, her only thought was the rest of the gang was here to finish the job!

As the new arrivals come into focus, the sound of the busy street rushes into her ears.  She is surrounded by her friends that she left at the club what seemed to be an eternity ago.  Now sitting on the curb to the left of that club, the dark figure nor the other gang members are anywhere to be seen.

“My God Donna, where the FUCK did you come from?” the one who pulled her arm exclaimed.

Instead of responding Donna grabbed ahold of her best friend pulling her down hugging her tightly.

Her friend hugged her back allowing the relief that this girl is ok wash over her.  Tension leaves loosening the once taught muscles in her back.

“Jesus.” Said one of the other girls, as they all giggled at the awkward sight.

© 2013 Kinse, My Sweet Hero

The Jade Monkey

O’Reilly’s Tavern 11:38PM EST

Located on the outskirts of a small town is a quaint tavern with a max occupancy of 86.  Despite being on a back road and well away from the beaten path the bar is surrounded by vehicles and packed beyond its means at 146 patrons.

The parking lot is a patch a dirt surrounding the front  two cars deep and expanding the length of the building.  Cars surround the front porch and either side for the single lane road.   Heading west on the street takes you to highway 21 which eventually leads to Twinsburg Ohio and east dead ends at the Henderson’s farm about ten miles down.

Despite the out-of-the-way geographical location, the bar maintains a steady clientele on normal days.  On this day though, third Friday of the month, a popular Irish band from the nearby town of Creeksville plays on O’Relly’s small ‘stage’.

The bars ‘stage’ is an area at the rear next to the backroom door, where three high tables and six stools are storedin back for the current venues handful of instruments and portable amp.  Tonight being the Keltic Kilts, a lively group featuring an accordion masterfully played.

To the left of the stage is the bar’s modest serving area, featuring a full complement of liquor, several domestic ales on tap and a variety of popular Irish brews.  Standing at 5’2” is a bartender with a head of wild red hair.  Wearing a tight shirt tied below her chest baring her midriff, a small plaid skirt only revealing navy blue tights ending in a pair of ankle high leather boots.

The other bartender is her younger brother who towers over her at 6’10”, he wears a black vest over a white shirt and blue jeans.  His thick arms practically tear out of the end of the shirt sleeves.  Pretty much the reason his sister Don, is off limits.  Together they run a well-oiled bar, along with two waitresses and a short order cook who can be seen from the kitchen’s window to the far left of the counter.

Despite maxing out the allowed occupancy, drinks are making their way to the thirsty, dancing is a must and fighting is kept at a low.  All in all they can crank the sound and never worry about the neighbors complaining.

As the band seamlessly moves to its next number, never missing a beat, an older gentleman makes his way through the establishment toward the counter.  Despite his out-of-place appearance, no one takes notice of the new arrival.

The man is wearing a three piece grey suit, fresh from the rack.  His jet black hair slicked back, clean shaven with a thin well-trimmed mustache which curves around his lips ending just above the chin.  His well-manicured right hand grasps a handle-less walking stick which is capped off with a golf ball size ruby in a gold setting affixed to a hand carved mahogany shaft.  His left hand is casually in his pocket fiddling with a small object.

As he moves through the bar he takes a direct route to the serving counter as the patrons shift out of his way without missing a beat, never making contact with the man in the suit and the man never stepping aside for anyone.

The man moves his way between two burly guys both tower over his 5’9” frame.  The larger men were deep in conversation, the one to the left seemed to have “lost interest” as the smaller man barged in turning his attention elsewhere never taking notice of the mysterious figure, but the one to the right immediately took offence.

“Fuck off shorty before I choke you on your pretty tie” the burly man exclaimed.

The stranger simply looked up and smiled at him, the larger man’s look of anger was instantly transformed into an expression of horror.  The big guy tried to scream, but no sound was able to escape his lips.  He just remained there frozen in place with his final emotion of pure fear.

Both bartenders were completely occupied with the multitude of other customers at the opposite end of where the stranger was standing.  The clean cut man simply tapped the counter once with the tip of his walking stick lightly.  The large muscular bartender who at the time was deep in conversation with two pretty ladies; he suddenly broke off in mid-sentence and made his way directly to the stranger ignoring all other requests.

His sister took notice though as he pushed past her to the other side of the bar and watched her brother help an older gentleman completely out of sorts of the rest of the bar.  The stranger feeling her stare met her eyes, she shivered the moment they locked.  Taking a step forward to call out to her younger sibling she was stopped by man leaning over the counter and grasping her arm.

Startled by the intrusion she turned to lay fury into the man who violated her side of the bar, but took notice to the beer tap overflowing the glass that she was pouring behind the counter.  Immediately sparked into action she quickly forgot about the odd scene that just took place.

Her younger brother stopped before the stranger looking at him expectantly.

Smiling the man placed his order “I will have a whiskey neat young man.”

The bartender moved into action and prepared the stranger’s order, placing the shot glass in front of him.  The man tilted his head as if to dismiss and, shaking his head as if momentarily dazed, he went back to serving the other patrons.

The stranger placed the walking stick on the counter and lightly played with the glass in his right hand.  He pulled his left hand from the pocket along with the object he was fiddling with.  Ignoring the drink he held the object before him.

On a leather rope necklace was a carved egg shaped hunk of jade set in a gold frame.  The front half was an intricate carving of a squatting monkey figure, both its hands covered the monkey’s eyes.  The rear half was its smooth egg shape, both sides separated evenly by its gold frame.  The whole medallion stood almost two inches.

He held the jade monkey reverently; mesmerized by the artistry.  Without looking away from the figure he downed his whiskey and slammed the glass back on the counter. Without letting go of the shot glass the bartender quickly refilled his drink of choice and went back to his routine just as fast, the stranger drank this last shot slower and placing the glass down, softly this time, he pocketed the figure and took hold of his cane.

Precisely 11:45PM a young lady enters the bar, also out of sorts but does not stand out as lavishly as the stranger did.  The man smiles and makes his way to the new comer. 

©2013 Kinse, My Sweet Hero

Reflection

underground you go
reduced to sheep, gods no more
alone? she is not.

zero courage......you
I will not honor your pact
my prison! I Choose!

©2013 Kinse, My Sweet Hero

See in Love

you see into me
     eyes so deep I am longing
          knowing you is hard

now you must be strong
     our future is unknown
          my hope is anew

© 2013 Kinse, My Sweet Hero

Interrupt your regular scheduled program

“…it is now ten o’clock on the hour, if you are just joining us there has been reports of a possible terrorist attack in Twinsburg Ohio.  Witnesses are saying, what they believe to be an explosion at the Winfield Chemical Plant”

“…no wait, they were not saying explosion, they are saying they witnessed a, and I quote, ‘Complete annihilation …”

“…national guard and local law enforcement has set up a five mile blockade around the perimeter of the former plant. Keeping anyone from entering or leaving the vicinity…”

“…airspace has also been restricted…”

“..Authorities are cautioning anyone who comes close to the blockade to avoid the area at all cost for a possible contamination of the area likely…”

“…The nearby town of Twinsburg, no more than ten miles south of the plant, is on a voluntary evacuation….”

“…on site we have CMM’s correspondent Sandra Mizaru, Sandra?”

“…Thank Steve, walking down Main Street is a scene I can only describe a typical day at Twinsburg, but today is far from typical.  The residents, a population no more than 10,000, are slowly evacuating further south downwind of the plant.  The scene is certainly well organized and although fear can be registered on the citizens of Twinsburg, the town council has things well under control…”

“…Sandra, can you tell us more on the events that occurred earlier this morning…”

“..well Steve, the most we have is a phone call from a security guard who was doing a drive by of the facility when the four guards on duty failed to check in.  He contacted his home base speaking with the night receptionist describing an unbelievable scene…”

“…Guardsafe Security records all calls in and out of their facility, Winfeild employees GuardSafe to watch over the Plant at night time, during the day they have their own private security…”

“…the company was able to pass along an edited copy of the call, as you will hear the guard was cut off by an approaching figure then the line was disconnected, we believe the person who approached the guard was the first responders to this horrendous scene…”

“…Thank you, we have the recording here at the studio, I must warn you it is somewhat disturbing…”
…hello…hello..Mary?…
hello mike, did you forg…..
m..mary its gone….. there is nothing …… not even….<unintelligible>
...Mike? Mike? Are you there? What’s gone?....
….complete….. annihilation…
Mike?....

“…This is where the call is cut off, though unintelligible, a second voice was heard before the call ended….”

“…Just in, our Ohio affiliate MCN just reported that shortly after the call they received a tip and was able to do a quick flyby before the military was able to get organized and restrict airspace….”

“…Although their equipment was immediately seized upon landing, they were not held…”

“…they reported on that they could not see any of the destruction, the usual bright lights of the Plant was not glaring, although they could not see rubble or aftermath, they also could not see any sign of the building itself…”

“…by dawn the area was completely sealed off…”

“…Sandra, have any reports of casualties come in?”

“..well Steve as for as we can tell only the four GuardSafe officers are missing..the patrolman who was following up on his colleagues is yet to be released from his detainment…”

“…if indeed there was any air contamination the officer would certainly be effected being so close to ground zero…”

“…Thank you Sandra…”

“…we have live via Skype three environmentalists who had visited Twinsburg from Ohio State University running tests on the local water supply for possible contamination from the Plant.  Professor Gary Scott, his teacher’s Assistant Vince McKean, and third year student Cindy Weis…”

“…Hi Steve, thank you for having us…”

“.Professor Scott I understand Homeland Security has just visited you in regards to the incident?”

“…yes Steve, the possibility of Eco terrorists has come up in their investigations, my team and I are well known advocates for the cleanup of Twinsburg River.  The river feeds into the town’s aquifer and is also used to irrigate the farmland to the east…”

“…I understand that you were arrested for trespassing on the Plant’s private property, later the charges were dropped…”

“…yes, this was a huge misunderstanding, our project is passive only, preliminary stages, we are to run tests and later report on our findings…my team discovered what we thought to be calf carcasses near the river bed…I volunteered to examine the corpses, but wandered too far into Winfeild property where they were keeping an eye on us and swiftly moved in to detain me…they then turned me over to the towns police department…”

“…can you tell us more on your research?...”

“…originally this was brought to our attention by one of our students, their younger siblings, eight year old boy and four year old girl, have inexplicably come ill…his father had  lost his job due to lay offs and cutting back they no longer purchased bottled water from their grocer rather they began to use the tap…”

“…the student suspected something and being new to our program he asked for help from my TA, with some convincing and preliminary tests of the tap water I put together a research project and headed out to the small town…”

“…the children’s illnesses was indeed suspect and our tests were positive for contaminants, we just did not have enough to expose the plant yet.  In fact if we did not return to the university campus last week to apply for a research grant, we would not have a decent alibi for our whereabouts…”

“…thank you professor…there are some speculations that being so remote and surrounded by such a small population that the parties involved may indeed be eco terrorist, possibly US citizens…”



© 2013 Kinse, My Sweet Hero

Immortal Pact

He sat there, waiting.

A large field surrounded by a dense forest.  Beyond the trees large mountain peaks can be seen in the distance.

The man sat waiting, contemplating the grass as it swayed gently in the calm breeze.

He sat crossed legged facing south as the high sun marks midday.

The man held his thick hand over the tops of the blades allowing them to tickle his palm as they dance beneath his flesh.

As the wind changes it brings the scent of lavender from a nearby patch of flowers, he leaned back slightly taking a deep breath, absorbing the sweet fragrance.

The man sat cross legged in a large field, waiting.

An old man appears from the southern edge of the field out of the dense tree line.  Behind him another follows suit.

The waiting man takes no notice as three more exit the forest from separate points.

The man opens his eyes now looking at the clear bright blue sky, combs his fingers through his thick black hair, adding to the wild nature of it.  Draws another deep breath noisily through his nose as a slight grin plays at the corner of his mouth.

The first older man to exit the forest is walking with a cane, slowly and steadily makes his way to the hill at the center of the field to the sitting figure.  The other four, much younger, trail behind keeping his slow pace, the closer of them leans forward and takes the older man’s arm to steady him as he moves along a patch of rocks.

The waiting figure still does not take notice of the group moving toward him.  Instead he continues to ponder the cloudless sky, seemingly looking past the deep blue to the hidden stars beyond.  His eyes move toward the one star visible to man, and looks deeply into the prominent yellow ball.

The procession of men continue at pace.  All five are garbed in simple brown tunics draped over their left shoulders covering their flesh; chest to ankles.  Their bare feet poke out from the lower folds with each stride.

The waiting man remains seated as the group make their way to the base of the hill where he rests.  As the group moves in, his small playful grin turns into a smile.

The older man pauses about five paces from the sitting figure.  The man then acknowledge the presence of these travelers with a quick wink and a nod.  He slowly gets up, the man standing a little over two meters, two heads taller than the tallest of the group.

All five men boast shaved heads, faces exhibiting ink that tells the story of various hunts and achievements.  The older man, now grasping his tall walking stick with both hands, has a long bone through his base of his nose.  He stares directly at the waiting figure with stone white eyes of a blind man.

The old man then shakily holds out his right hand, not from any sort of fear but from apparent age.  The tall figure steps forward and firmly takes the old man’s forearm as the old man grasps his with a surprisingly strong grip.  The older man then brandishes a toothless grin as the younger responds with a subtle laugh.

The tall man wears a loose leather vest baring a thick chest and muscular arms.  His simple slacks thick and baggy held on by frayed rope, he too were no sandals.

“The time of men has approached” the old man was the first to break the silence, speaking a long dead tribal language in a dry papery tone.

“Yes my old friend, it is certainly a very good day.” The tall figure replies as he places a hand on his lifelong friend’s shoulder, “Seeing you and your children and your children’s children, brings me great joy, watching you grow up from a wild stick of a boy who climbed trees and swam in the great lake naked amongst the silver fish was what made these last seven decades of my time here so magnificent.”

The tall man shed a small happy tear as the older man wipes away at his own eyes, both grinning at memories from long ago.

The older man turns his blind eyes away, seemingly staring off in the distance.  Not seeing the far off tree lines but seeing the man before him watching over as he plays in this very field as a boy.  The old man turns back, straitening up making himself taller, his many wrinkles seemed to melt slightly away as he musters up a pocket of youth, looking up at this figure before him with great respect and admiration.

“You were my father when my own died in the Felcian war, you were my guardian when my mother grew sick and you nursed her back to health, you were my best man at my wedding when I took my dear sweet Mizaru as my bride, and you stood there in the distance watching over my children and then their children.”

The old man faltered a little as if to fall, two from his group reached out but it was the tall man that took him in his arms.  The older man than broke down, in the grasp of this powerful figure he wept like a child, from sorrow, from pride, from happiness, from the knowledge of what is to pass.

“This future” the figure gestured to the men behind the older, while pulling him closer “belongs to them … my time…” he pauses and looks over his shoulder at a unheard sound.

Meanwhile on the other side of the world.  Several men move wearily along a shoreline, returning from a long fishing excursion.  They carry nets filled with kolios.  Laughing and sharing tales of other times at sea.

The youngest of the group, a boy no older than eleven, eagerly marched ahead, happy to be a part of his first exhibition, smiling at the exaggerated stories of his elders.  Staring ahead he stops suddenly, the grin quickly disappears making way for a shocked expression.

The closer man at his heals nearly trips over him, cursing the lad not noticing the figure the smaller one’s eye was transfixed on.  The group slowly grows silent as one by one they spot the woman walking out from the sea.

Stunned the men gather around the shoreline as this beautiful creature seemingly glides slowly from the water with no boat in site.  Completely nude she pauses before the men, standing there as if allowing them to admire her.

The oldest of the group quickly breaks his trance grabs a burlap blanket rushes over and covers this young beauty.

Her shame now covered, the ugly sack does not admonish her beauty but her grace seems to make the sack look magnificent on her.

Unnoticed four women, elders from their village, push their way through the group, as three of them scowl at the gawking men and the fourth, the leader, moves toward the young lady.

The men, out of deep respect for the older women, move aside for the elders allowing clear passage.  The lead woman stops two feet from the figure and quickly goes to one knee before her.  The proceeding women follow suit and as if by example the men clumsily did the same.

The old woman at the rear of the four peered over her should at the fishermen, still on one knee, impossibly her scowled deepened.  She raised both her arms toward them and waved them away.

The men quickly took a hint got up and hurried off toward the village.  The young boy though hesitated still transfixed on the sea woman who was meeting his eyes with a smile.  The old woman in the rear grunted and nodded her head toward the village, and without breaking eye contact he quickly gets up and darts off finally looking away.  He turns, pausing at the wild growth along the edge of the beach, and looks at the sea lady one last time, finally startled by a louder grunt from the angry woman he disappears over the hill.

The old angry woman looks back at the sea tilting her head toward the ground in respect, along with the other three.  After a few seconds of this the lead woman looks up and struggles to her feet.  The young lady finally breaks her pose to lend her support.

This proud woman allows the help of the younger and brushes the sand from her skirt with one hand as the other arm still hangs on to the lady.  She then looks up and makes eye contact with the beauty.  For a second even she is lost in her splendid green eyes.  The other women, now standing, move in closer to the pair.

The young lady broke the silence in ancient Greek she speaks in a musical voice “Our time here has ended…”




© 2013 Kinse, My Sweet Hero